Feeling Itchy in a sex toy party

well... I had a feeling this day would come, and sure enough.... it did today.

there has been scuttlebutt around the streets of Stepford, and most especially at the recent Bunco gatherings of someone hosting a toy party.

a sex toy party.

I just got my invitation this morning, and I have to tell you... the whole idea makes me feel itchy. ok, ok... I'm sure many (if not MOST) of you are wondering what the problem is with someone throwing one of those sex toy parties. To be completely honest... I don't find anything wrong with someone HAVING one of those parties... I just have major issues with the idea of ATTENDING one.


I mean.. let's face it.. I'm not single anymore... (not that I ever had sex before I got married, mom and dad....) and as much as I enjoy my neighbors... these ladies are NOT my girlfriends. I mean... I don't discuss my marital sex life with these women.. why in hell would I want to purchase an accessory for it in front of them???


I guess it goes back to my little barometer I have when it comes to friends. There's the kind of 'friends' that you would allow to see you without a bra, the kind that you let come bathing suit shopping with you, the kind you can get drunk in front of, the kind you talk about your husband with, and finally... the ultimate level of trust in friendship.... the kind you would go to vegas with.


so... being that only a few of them even qualify for the no-bra level, you can imagine my apprehension for browsing things I would use wearing LESS than my bra.

and of course... if I've said it before, I've said it 100 times. I have issues. my brain??? it's one of those things that just does NOT shut off. the visuals keep coming no matter WHAT I do to cover my eyes. Think that part of Fight Club when Tyler is splicing in pornographic images into kids' movies. it's as perverse as it is horrific. This is about as best I can do to describe the visuals my brain conjures when I think of knowing what toys my neighbors are buying for use with their husbands.

seriously... I've MET these women's husbands. and while there is no way I want to be thinking of the bunco girls themselves naked.... I SURE as hell don't want to picture them doing it with their husbands. then to add an element of kink??? my eyes burn just thinking about it.

so no. I do not think I will be attending the party thursday night. I'll be bleaching my skin that night.

Guys and Dolls: Fall For Tons of Amazing Love Doll Tonight!

When you think of sex dolls, what comes to mind? If your first thoughts are of bachelor party gags and gifts for lonely single friends, you're not alone. However, with the use of incredible new and improved technology, love dolls are no longer the sole property of the lovelorn. Even couples can enhance their fantasy role-play by incorporating a sexy doll into their normal routine.

With a doll for every fetish and sexual preference, there's sure to be one or two that will light your fire!

It's normal to be shy about expressing your sexual fantasies to a real-life lover, and that's one reason why love dolls are an amazing invention! With a doll for every fetish, you never have to worry about being rejected or ridiculed for wanting to experiment with something a little less traditional! Would you like a partner who comes prepared to practice bondage and discipline? What about the mature Mrs. Robinson of your dreams? We even have several big, beautiful girls for the taking.

Do visions of arousing Asian women dance in your head? You don't need to move to Japan to be wooed and wowed by a geisha. Our selection of ethnic dolls includes a greek goddess, a stunning ebony seductress, and an italian princess. Don't waste your precious vacation time on an island cruise when you can "lay" a hot island babe every night in the comfort of your own bed.

If you prefer a professional woman, don't fret. Play doctor with Naomi, the nurse who is always waiting at your bedside to perk you up, or go for a roll in the hay with your very own Milk Maid. Would you rather have a different kind of maid? This sexy lady is ready to clean out your drawers! Experiment with erotic role-play in the safety and comfort of your own home.

Digital Alarm Clock-radio Spy Hidden Color Camera

This is a powerful wireless color camera hidden in alarm clock-radio. New high power 1.2 GHz technology provides up to 1000 ft range of transmition with solid stability. Features: This surveillance system is well hidden inside a digital clock-radio with a built-in transmitter. The camera and transmitter are invisible to the human eye. The hidden video camera will view in low, normal or bright light conditions.

The camera's micro electronic sensor automatically adjust for any change of light. This covert system can be applied to almost any ambience. Only one electrical cord to power both the hidden spy camera and the clock itself.

Camera use 1.2Ghz Freq with horizontal Resolution: 382TV with longer range up to 1000ft And this LED Digital clock employ LED alarm clock with calendar, hourly chime, 12/24 hour display, data-guard for external power failure, FM scan radio. This model can be operated by battery or with power supply.

The hidden camera and transmitter are built-in to each item and the included receiver connects to any TV with video inputs or VCR for recording. The camera is very easy to operate and no installation is required The complete set includes: Digital Clock-Radio, Spy Hidden Camera 1.2 Receiver (no audio for better sharp picture),Video Cable, DC power adapter for receiver, DC power adapter for Clock-Radio, Spy Camera Manual

• Frequency: 1.2GHz Range up to 1000 Feet !
• horizontal Resolution: 382TV
• The hidden video camera will view in low, normal or bright light conditions
• Only one electrical cord to power both the hidden spy camera and the clock itself
• The camera's micro electronic sensor automatically adjust for any change of light

Doctor Says Sexsomnia (Sleep Sex) Is Real Disorder

New Scientist has cracked the sleep sex story once again, reporting on the effects sexsomnia has on intimate relationships. (If you, like me, are temporarily without bugmenot, just check the Reuters story, which is pretty close.)

It’s difficult to find much publicly available on the subject, but the next time you’re in the stacks at your local research institution (or you scam a login to one of these sites), here’s some places to start:

• Sexsomnia: a new parasomnia? This is the originating paper in the field. From the abstract: “Sexsomnia has some distinct features that separate it from sleepwalking. The automatic arousal is more prominent, motor activities are relatively restricted and specific, and some form of dream mentation is often present.”
• A phenomenology of problematic sexual behavior occurring in sleep. A more recent study drawn from Internet respondents. “Results suggest that sleep sex can elicit negative emotions and cognitions that may become a source of personal and relational distress. Clinician familiarity with problematic sleep sex may foster more effective communication with individuals presenting with such complaints.”
• You can also keep an eye on “sleep sex” studies, and sign yourself up at Sleepsex.org. Stanford ran this one in 2002, and found that “…symptoms [that] included loud, disruptive moaning on one end of the scale and sexual assault on the other. Regardless of how unusual or violent the behavior, patients had no memory of the events the next morning.”

Yes, sexual assault. One trend in the sexsomnia field is use the expert testimony of researchers to intervene in charges of sexual assault made against actual or alleged sufferers for the disorder. Wikipedia currently points to three different cases of rape charges being dropped when the assailant was shown to have sexsomnia. Of the three, however, one man was found guilty on appeal, and prosecutors are seeking a similar appeal in a second case.

What with how very little research goes into things sex, and the still-significant uphill battles rape survivors face in seeking legal redress, I think it’s safe to give decent pause at how the sleep sex field is developing, as, in the words of one sexsomniac, “Is this just a stipulation or a convenience [sic] excuse with men with a sex obsession?”

Air Travel Sex Guide: Intercourse

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Air Travel Sex Guide: Sex in the Lavatories

For the comfort and consideration of all passengers, we request that couples limit their sessions to 15 minutes or less, whether or not climax is achieved. Please engage the "Having Sex" sign on the lavatory door so that you will not be disturbed.

To facilitate sex in the close quarters of an airline lavatory, may we suggest the following positions. Due to the size of the facilities, threesomes are prohibited.Seated sex positions are recommended if the airplane encounters turbulence.We must remind you that smoking after sex or tampering with a lavatory smoke detector are federal offenses.

Blow Job (Sitting)
If emergency fecal evacuation is required, this position may be used for performing a blumpkin maneuver. In this case, be sure the commode lid is OPEN.

Blow Job (Standing)
If you do not swallow, please spit into the commode, or alternately, the sink.

Cunnilingus
To avoid being overwhelmed by a foul odor, be sure that the commode lid is shut before your female partner is seated. If the commode is closed and you are still overwhelmed by a foul odor during cunnilingus, we suggest your partner review basic hygiene procedures. Unfortunately, due to space considerations, an in-flight bidet is not available.

Fingering (Seated)
After inserting a hand into your partner’s panties, digitally stimulate her clitoris using up-and-down, side-to-side, or circular motions. If you cannot locate the clitoris, refer to the detailed diagram on the other side of this card.

Air Travel Sex Guide: Sex While Seated

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Dogging - The New Sex Trend in U.K.

Here's something for all of you looking for a one-night tryst but don't want to venture further than the public park. It's called "dogging," and it's essentially having sex in a car parked in a public place with other people watching or even joining in.

This pastime originated in the U.K., where it is no less than a craze, but now it's rapidly gaining popularity in the U.S., Canada, Germany, France, Ireland, and New Zealand.

The name is derived from Peeping Toms who would follow, or "dog," couples hoping to catch them having sex. Then dogging was done in the tube stations late at night. In its most recent incarnation, it's being done in parking lots and parks.

Now if you're interested in getting involved in the dogging scene, here's some information about the rules, where to find the scene and how it's done.

How to find it

Online
Doggers usually find each other amid Internet forums and newsgroups. It's much quicker than popping into every park in the area looking for action. Some dogging forums will post time and place of these events. Other times they ask doggers to reply with their cell phone number then use text messages to reveal the location, to ensure it remains secret.

In the U.K., doggers' websites list the most popular secluded locations, like public parks and parking lots.

Bluetooth
Or you can always opt for "Toothing." Using Bluetooth technology, you can find other PDA phones in your vicinity while in a specific location like a parking lot, a nightclub or public transport, and send out a general proposition seeing if anyone is up for some action.

Know how it's done

Doggers use a series of simple signals to let others know what they're up to.

Let others find you
If you want to invite voyeurs to approach your car and get an eyeful, park in a somewhat visible spot, then flash your headlights or leave the interior car light on. This will tell everyone that you're doggers and you're about to put on a show.

Give them a clear view
When there are voyeurs outside the car watching you, roll down the windows a smidgen if you want them to get an even better view of the action.

Open your door to invite others
If you want them to share in the sexual activity, the accepted way to do this is by opening the door and letting one of them in or by getting out of the vehicle.

When Job Stress Saps Your Sexual Energy

What can you do when work woes lead to a lackluster libido? Or your husband falls asleep during sex? And which lubes are safe? Supersextoy answers your queries.

Q: As a general manager for a big office, I am under a lot of stress. Due to my work, my sexual appetite is not what it once was. My wife and I have been married for five years and we have always been very close sexually, but lately my life has been all work, all stress and no intimacy. Anything to recommend?

A: Yeah, I have some things to recommend: Put down the damn BlackBerry, stop taking your work home, shut off the cell phone.

Too simple and trite? "Oh, I just can't. My job depends on it!" Please. Stop whining. Look at the woman you married five years ago and tell me what is more important.

Where does this work-warrior culture come from, anyway? Do you think bragging over working 70 hours per week somehow makes you a brave modern knight, your PDA slung from your belt like your own Excalibur? Do you think you are going to heaven because you are still working at 9 p.m. and taking red-eyes to Boston? Sorry, pal.

Have you ever tasted fine olive oil and salted bread and fresh, cool wine while sitting on a white-washed terrace overlooking the blue Aegean with your wife sitting next to you, her beauty and her love a blessing you can't believe you deserve? That's heaven.

Can't afford the trip? Then take her out to dinner and talk about nothing work-related at all. Talk about a dream. Talk about the blue Aegean. The office will still be there tomorrow. No one is that important.

Stress experts agree that a major cause of stress is the feeling that we do not have control. But that feeling often is an illusion. We do have control. We can control how much stuff we buy, how much money we have to make to support that stuff. We can change our work environments.

Psychologist Alan Nagamoto, director of the UCLA stress clinic, suggests trying "to identify the specific source" of stress. If it is work, what is it about work? A collection of small things? One big thing?

Once you have identified the source, he says, ask yourself: "Is this anything I can do something about? Is it under my control?" Next, attempt a proper "adaptive solution." (Martinis don't count.) Sometimes that could mean doing nothing. Or it could mean making small or large changes - everything from delegating some tasks to finding a new job - to reduce stress.

Though it sounds cliché, a good workout and talking with trusted friends are good quickie stress-relievers. So is sex. Research proves it. Buck up and take your medicine like man.

By the way, your health could depend on controlling stress. Stress activates the autonomic nervous system, our fight-or-flight response. In the context of evolution, we are designed for short bursts of either running away or duking it out with the lion that is stalking us. Our bodies aren't made to run or fight all day, every day.

Besides, when we think we're on somebody's dinner menu, we tend not to think of getting it on with the cute wildebeest on the other side of the herd.

Q: My husband is 6-feet-tall and weighs over 400 pounds. He has sleep apnea and he can't stay awake during sex. He doesn't know this is happening, and I am turned off. How can I get turned back on?

A: Lady, your getting turned on is the least of your worries. The apnea, the obesity, the inappropriate sleepiness all make your husband a big risk for heart attack, diabetes, stroke and impotence.

No kidding, get him in to see his physician, ask the doc about a sleep specialist and a weight-loss program. It may take awhile, but in time, your sex problem should resolve.

Q: Are there certain lubricants that aren't good for women, like the ones that are petroleum-based? Can some promote yeast infections?

A: Time was, there was just K-Y. Now selecting sex lubes is like selecting wine. Stores shelves are full of different lubes.

If they are sold as a "sexual" or "personal" lubricant, they're likely safe. If they are sold as a "novelty," they may not be safe.

Many novelty lubes are flavored, and if they are, they may contain sugars that can promote yeast infections. This doesn't mean all flavored non-novelty lubes will, so read labels if you just can't face having sex that doesn't taste like choco-banana.

Petroleum-based products such as Vaseline don't make good sex lubes either, partly because they weaken condoms.

Silicone lubes can feel great, and they last a long time, but never use them with a silicone sex toy. They'll integrate with the toy and "melt" it, creating a gooey mess on the surface.

Water-based lubes may not last as long as the silicone-based ones, but they are safe for condoms, sex toys and you.

Why Do Men Love Blow Job So Much?

Most men love oral sex performed on them for a few reasons. It of course feels really good, especially when it is done well. It makes them feel desired and of course it lets them know that you really appreciate their penis and them.

I think too often men are made to feel ridiculous for focusing so much attention on their penis whether it be size or it getting attention. I think what women forget is that we focus on things that could be perceived as being ridiculous too. Think about how much most women obsess about how big their butt looks in a certain dress or if the bra with underwire makes their breasts look good so that we can get that compliment when we walk out to go to a party. Underneath it all we all have the same need... to be appreciated.

What must men feel when you barter with them to suck their cock for the dishes to be done? I don't know about you, but it would be a terrible blow to my self esteem to have someone tell me that in order for them to be sexual with me, I would have to do the dishes for the week!
No wonder men and women often think of fellatio as something a bit dirty... we tend to make it that way don't we? Cleaning the dishes is dirty and undesirable and yet it gets compared to the equivalent of fellatio? We also often think of it as derogatory to the giver... yet in reality it is an opportunity to take control! I think when we take negative attitudes toward our sex life then the true beauty of love and sex is terribly belittled.

Even when a person chooses to be with a variety of partners while dating or through open relationships, we can really enjoy sex on a deeper level when we let ourselves BE with people. Being aware of the beauty of sensuality in our partner(s) and ourselves is what makes any sexual moment an amazing experience. Isn't that true of anything in life? How often do we drive to work not even taking a moment to notice the beautiful sun shining down through the clouds and lighting the world up with it's brilliance. How about how often we shove food down our throats without taking the time to really enjoy each morsel of what we are eating?

The same applies to sex... when we are mindful of our partner(s) and our own needs, sensations, and emotions then you will be better able to truly enjoy what life has to offer when it comes to oral sex or any kind of sexual activity!

Art of a Great Blow Job, Oral Sex

Giving head, a blow job, fellatio, call it what you like, but there are many wonderful benefits to performing this delicious sex act.

For one, it can provide the one giving it empowerment with infinite possibilities to be creative and provide amazing pleasure. Particularly when performed with enthusiasm it can not only be incredible to the receiver but to the one providing it as well.

Let's first discuss the most important ingredient to giving fantastic fellatio... ATTITUDE.

If you approach this as something that disgusts you, or even a chore then in my opinion, you shouldn't bother doing it.

No matter how many cool tips you know, you will never give really good head with out desire driving it. Sex should be fun and exciting to each partner no matter what you are doing.

Several women I know have told me that they exchange favors with their husband for fellatio. For example, one friend told me that her husband will do the dishes for a week just to get a blow job! I have to say that if that is the kinda of sex life you have... you are missing out on some serious passion.

Don't ever underestimate the power of your perceptions. If you perceive any sex act, including fellatio to be dirty, repulsive, or a chore then it will be.

If you approach it as an opportunity to be the sexual goddess or god in the bedroom where you have total (consensual) control over your partner, with the ability to make them scream out for more until they reach an earth shattering orgasm where they can't stand up for a half an hour due to the sheer mind blowing sexual experience they just had... then I'd say you are going in the best direction for attitude in giving fellatio.

My husband and I always say that desire starts in the mind and honestly I see nothing more important to a good sex life than your attitude and perception toward it. That is why I always suggest communication as it provides a way to talk about what really turns you on. It also gives you the opportunity to work through old belief systems about sex that no longer serve you and end up holding you back sexually.

You don't want to make the mistake of thinking that figuring out what the best techniques are will make you the best lover. Remembering that attitude will make up for any lack of technique is probably the best sex advice you'll ever get!

To those wanting to give incredible fellatio, let me give you a quick example of what I mean about attitude.

Negative Attitude-
Imagine your man lying on the bed. You pull his pants down as though you are trying to just get down to business. You open your mouth and take him in going up and down with no variation, no passion and secretly, you just can't wait for this to be done. You demand that he tell you when he is about to cum so you can jerk your mouth away to prevent from taking any of that nasty semen in your mouth. Then when he does orgasm, you let it go all over him and then leave him there because you have things to do.

Positive Attitude-
Imagine your man lying on the bed. You come in slowly from his ankles smiling at him while keeping eye contact. You teasingly strip the clothes off his entire body looking him over as though you can hardly contain yourself, while licking and rubbing him everywhere you touch him. You slide your body against his, then downward now so your genitals are positioned over his knee while you toy with his inner thigh and pubic area. You run your fingers through his pubic hair and over his balls slowly and you lick the tip of his penis softly while gazing into his eyes showing your desire. Holding him now in your hand you take some warming, flavored lubricant and run it up and down his head and shaft like pouring hot chocolate syrup onto a sundae you are about to devour. Licking his balls lightly and then sucking softly on them you move your hand up and down his now slickened cock and use the other hand to squeeze the base while you grind your genitals against his leg.

Then after a variety of tantalizing techniques you eagerly await his orgasm with an open mouth waiting for him to either shoot inside your mouth or if you do not care for the taste take it deep in the back of your throat so you fuck him with your mouth and let his cum slide down the back of your throat with no aftertaste or let it cum into your hands, or even better... let it moisten your lips, face and chest.

Are you seeing a difference here? Even if you decide to give a "Quickie" blow job, your attitude will allow you to be the best he's ever had. Men, just like women, want to feel desired, so to make him feel like orally pleasuring him is repulsive to you is certainly a "blow" to his ego. Show him that you desire him no matter what sexual activity you do and you will really make it fantastic.